Burger King... Home of the WTF?

Originally posted by Cheeze Boozer on March 25th, 2009

Three glimpses of an efficacious commercial for it to take effect, two minutes to decide what to eat for lunch, and one sloppy tard to slap it all together from a trough in a matter of seconds.

First off, when considering the option of ordering a second "side" burger, it should come on the rationalization of thinking, "I might still be hungry", and NOT "what if one tastes like shit?", as is often the case when standing in line, deciding what to order at BK.

However, it makes no difference, as Burger King is one fast food place where BOTH of your burgers may taste like ass.

Deciding to give in to the hype surrounding the new Mushroom & Swiss Steakhouse burger, I ordered it. Without yet unwrapping the packaging, I had the opportunity to enjoy the combination of grease and steakhouse sauce all over my hands. It's as though they strategically placed more sauce outside the bun rather than in. Are they now applying condiments with a high pressure hose?

Backup Fish burger offered BK no redemption. Tasting as though it was caught at a Waste Water Treatment plant.

On a similar note, can someone please tell me why I always get the fucking white stump of the lettuce? Do they even order the whole lettuce or just get a box of stumps shipped in every week? Where does the normal part of the lettuce always go? Because it sure as hell never ends up in my burger.

This burger enthusiast has come to the conclusion that the only decent thing to come out of BK is the Whopper...
and that's only IF you remove the stump.